it's bothering me, in a serious rate

I woke up this morning

with some much weary feeling in my heart
err... sounds melancholic I know, probably due to my pasca-menstrual period, I've cried a lot beacuse of this, I became more sensitive, in an unimportant way, seriously it's ridiculous, but I still can't control it, I know I am 21, which is old enough...

yeaah sometimes this situation comes to me...
I become so sensitive, and think too much about how people see me...
do you get it? 

 when sometimes I don't care about how I treat people
I mean, I treat them as how they treat me, or how I want them to treat me

maybe this is what they call how AB-liner *people with AB typed blood* has a double personality
hey I am still learn to understand myself, and how I want to be, since THE ONLY PERSON THAT WE CAN TRUST IS OURSELF

I believe there are so many people, esp. the boys *okay I am being frontal here* that see me as a cold hearted bitch
aaargh it's irritating!!! actually it's really really troublesome
All I want is having so many many many friends, err but I guess it made some people think in a different way, or to some people who wasn't close enough to me and kinda having a special thingy on me...
do you understand what I mean?

my body always react like... some rejection, I don't know is it normal? is it only me or some people experienced the same, is it uniqueness or BURDEN!
gaaah!!! I don't understand

I KNOW I MAY LOOKED LIKE A MAJOR BAD GIRL, who loves to break those heart
but no no no!!!  I would like to be a friend, only if I don't know if there are some secret thingy behind
I may be silly and full of jokes *but maybe not a funny one... yeaah ain't a comedian though*

it's just maybe I don't want to be labeled as a girl with full of fake hopes *yeaaah!!! that kinda hope!!!*
so maybe it's like emmm... if I treat you like a cold-hearted bitch, I never really mean to, it just I don't want to go that far...
I have my own principle and believes and way of think, and I am a stubborn when I come to this

okay I know, that I can't satisty everybody
but at least I try to explain something
maybe nobody get it, it just that really wanna share it here, though the targets read it or not

but one thing for sure, if I treat you nice, I mean it, 
I am not trying to wear an angel mask...
whatever you what you call me...
it's just yeaah I got a double personality, I guess ._.

and I am pretty expresive you can tell how I feel from my faces, but at the same time I can keep it in a good way
ah why am I so confusing!
except for some case I've explained

so maybe somepeople will think :

but I'll be like


try to explain sumthin', this is my life I should fight for it

aaah I wanna grow and be better person, not the doubled personality and moody one :3

fyi, the KPOP Macros credits goes to this thread:

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